Perhaps it's the weather, the busyness of five Christmas programs, the obnoxious "in" excelsis rather than "een" excelsis deo that is pervasive in bad pop renditions of Christmas classics, but gosh darn it, I'm feeling more like Ebenezer Scrooge lately than Santa.
That is, until tonight.
I've spent the last two days away from students (which, I swear, didn't contribute to the change of heart!) and in my house, sleeping, prepping meals and baking treats for family, and spending time with friends that real life swept away from our little corner of the earth. There's nothing like spending time with old friends who know you better than you know yourself to make you feel better. Of course, the goodbyes that drag us back to reality are always hard, but the times together are so dang good that it's worth it. Always.
I got to spend yesterday at brunch with one such friend. The updates on her life are always welcome and entertaining (my old married self has half the adventures she has) and she's just such a crafty story teller, any time spent with her leaves me with cheeks sore from smiling.
Then, I had the opportunity to host my immediate family's Christmas celebration in my house. It was the first time in the past three Christmasses that we were all together, and it was such a breath of fresh air. It was just so good to be together. Simultaneously bittersweet, since my grandfather is no longer here, though the memories of hosting that sweet man on Christmas last year (in the house for which he did so much) kept my heart warm. Good family time, wherever it happens, is such a blessing.
Today I had the good fortune to spend an extra few hours with one of my closest friends, re-live college memories together, and just get caught up on life things. With a smile and a story for everything, and a quick wit that makes my belly ache from laughter, time with her is so precious. And then, we got to cap it off with dinner and a fabulous production of A Christmas Carol with other college friends who are dear to my heart. These special get-togethers involving lots of laughter and conversation have become a little holiday tradition for us (this was our third time; so hard to believe we're that far out of college).
At the end of the night I get to come home to our little house, festively dressed in it's one row of little white lights. Our little house has brought us many an adventure, and will continue to do so, I'm sure, but has also brought such precious memories. I can't wait to see what the future holds for us in this place.
When I walk in the door, there lies my amazing husband, fast asleep on the couch, exhausted from working four 4:00am-12:30pm shifts this week. Even after six years together, he still makes my heart melt. Just the sight of him, sleeping so peacefully that he barely rouses when my clumsy self enters the room makes my heart swell in praise to God for such a man. This man who works so hard, loves me so deeply and unconditionally, and always keeps a smile on my face -- I get to have him as my husband.
Reading another dear friend's post about the real reason for Christmas left me in awe of a God who would so humble himself because of his love for me. His love for me caused Him to need a Mary, walk this earth, suffer betrayal and feel the sting of death. That my God set so many things in motion to rescue me from myself and give me the chance to be with the One who loves me most . . .
God's grace in my life just overwhelmed me tonight.
His blessings are so rich and plentiful, far more than I could ever really deserve. But He does it because He loves me. He loves me that much, and all the good things he gives me in this life are there to serve as reminders of just how much He cares for me.
So, may this holiday season cause you to take stock of God's blessings in your life. May you remember how wide and high and long and deep is the love of Christ for you, and may it cause you to glorify Him with your life.
Perhaps, in the end, that's the spirit of Christmas. Or, at least, that's the spirit I'm feeling this year.
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